Oh Ya...Right...I Have a Blog...

Oh. Hello. Fancy meeting you here.

I wasn't feeling the blog thing for a while....but guess what people...come on, guess!?!!! I found another human pube on my desk this morning...seriously, that's right!...what.the.fuck.?! NOT ONLY do I dread waking up in the morning to sit in traffic, arrive at my most hated building in the world (think -  how a wrongfully convicted felon would feel about jail), and spend my day with my less than favorite people....but then I have to get here and find friggen pubes lying around! What the hell happens in here when I'm gone!?! I think I should install hidden cameras.

Moving on - I ran out of my anxiety medication conveniently while my doctor was on holidays - I know, I know, great planning...shut up, I already heard it from the BF. So that last couple weeks have been fun. I finally got a new prescription so I'll be good to go again in a week or so when everything gets back to normal. Thank fuck! For anyone out there who is smart enough to realise what they're dealing with, medicate themselves, and then stupid enough to stop taking the medication after 2 months...a) I know, my bad! right? b) GAH! Isn't is sooooo much worse dealing with anxiety after you realise what it's like to NOT have to deal with it? BRUTAL! I didn't realise what it was like to not feel this way until I started taking the medication, and now that it's out of my system I can't believe I lived feeling this way for so long. Anyhow, starting today shit should get back on track!

Next order of business. You know how when someone tells you their funny, or prefaces a story with "Oh.my.god. this is SO funny!" and then tells you a kind of lame story that you feel the need to at least chuckle at because they were SO sure it was hilarious? Well that's what it's like when people write in their blogs about how funny they are, and that they write a humor blog etc. Believe me, I read my fare share of humor blogs, and they don't announce that they're funny. Because why? It's SO lame, and takes away from whatever it is that may actually be funny. Seriously, I have been reading this one blog for like 5 or 6 months, and a few weeks ago there was a post announcing that the blog was changing, blah blah blah, but not to worry, it will still be as funny as ever, etc. And I was all... "wait...what?!? This blog is supposed to be funny?" I was reading it more because I thought the topics were interesting...and then more recently, because it was part of my blog reading routine...not at all because it is "funny"...which it's not. You want funny, read The Bloggess / Ask the Bloggess. That my friends is funny shit! And she doesn't rub your nose in it! Fancy that!

For my wee little Sister...who totally thinks I'm funny...but she has to because she's little'r than me, so I can beat her up! Happy 21st on the 21st! - Black Jack Birthday! I love you a million trillion times more than you can imagine!! I'm sad we can't celebrate in true Gilmore Girls fashion...but whatever, I have something special in store for you! Mucho Love little Kitten!

So You're Not a Fictional Character, I Guess That's Alright.

Last night I watched the season finale of The United States of Tara. If you've never seen it before the husband (Max, played by John Corbett) of the main character (Tara, played by Toni Collett) is perfect, just incredible...AND he's totally my type, so we can say I have more than a small crush on him... but in a "I know he's a fictional character, created by a woman, written for a predominately female audience" kind of way.

Anyhow to make a long story short he deals with a lot of shit and sticks by his wife in a way only most women could dream of. He's what romance stories are made of, and not a measuring stick most men would want to be compared to. He lives up to every unrealistic expectation possible, and is basically designed to make women look at their husband and think..."Fucker! If I had multiple personalities that made me punch you in the face while you were sleeping, or cheat on you multiple times, or totally ignore your aspirations and desires, you would totally not be this supportive...what the hell!?...Douche!".

Well apparently not only women think that...so do men, or at least my man anyhow. Last night while it was ending, the good ol' BF looked at me and said..."Fuck, is that what you compare me to?!!" to which I responded, after slight hesitation "No way babe... No one could live up to that!" (But it would be fucking awesome if they did!)

BF, I love you, even if you wouldn't be totally relaxed about me punching you in the face while you were sleeping.

FYI Mini Animals = Adorable...Finding Human Pubes = Disgusting

Good News?!!

There were no human pubic hairs on my desk this morning.

YIPPEE - It's so not my thing, you know, finding random human pubes daily...on my desk...so not finding any is good news all around, for me that is...but it could totally be your thing...in which case, puke.


Bad News!?!

House Hippos don't really exist and I sooooo want one!

“Drugs Drugs Drugs…Which are Good? Which are Bad?

Drugs Drugs Drugs, Ask Your Mom or Ask Your Dad!”

(Another 80’s commercial flashback coming atch'ya!...perhaps I watched too much TV as a child?)

When I searched for a picture of the commercial on Google this is what came up, but I think this was from the commercial that went "don't you put it in your mouth, don't you stuff it in your face, though it might look good to eat, though it might look good to taste, you could get sick, real quick" (if my memory serves me correctly). The message was lost on me as a kid as I was WAY too busy singing and dancing around to actually pay attention, but at least it was catchy enough I remember it 20 years later!
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Does anyone remember the log driver song?

“For He Goes Burling Down and Down White Water, That’s Where the Log Driver Learned to Step Lightly?”

The BF and I sing this probably way to much, and recently pulled it up on my iphone after a long discussion about it. 80’s children are FANTASTIC! Or at least our informative commercials and cartoons are!!

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Or what about, conjunction junction, what’s your function?
                        

Goodness gracious the 80’s were a good time, kids these days are missing out!!

Anyhow, the initial point of this post (before I got distracted by awesomeness) was, I’m starting anti-anxiety medication today…woo? Not sure how I feel about it yet. I’m hoping to see good results because things have been barely bearable lately, and I’m ready to give off some positive vibes again (the vibes have been less that stellar lately, and for that friends and strangers alike, I’m sorry). Anyhow, for those of you who know me, or have read previous posts, I have both anxiety and depression, and I’ve decided it’s time to control it, because seriously, 20 (memorable) years of dealing with it has been WAY too long! Wish me luck…or at least be jealous of my super cool childhood commercial memories!

“So Keep Fit and Have Fun”… “BODYBREAK” (with Hal Johnson and Joanne McCloud) – come on… I had to throw that one in there too!

(Those of you not from Canada or if you have never experienced the awesomeness that are these commercials, I feel sorry for you!)